Terra Bosart was born as Zach Bosart in 1982, and according to legend, has been drawing since 1984. George Orwell would have been proud. The imagined takes over the proposed prediction.
I’ve always been fascinated with the imagined. The metaphysical that seems so real, and is annoyingly out of reach most of the time. Raised Catholic, I began to see very quickly the confines of a singular belief system, and struggled with this until my mid teens.
When I was in Catholic grade school, we were presented with a seemingly simple project. I have no idea what the teacher intended for us to learn from the assignment, although the cynic in me leads me to think we were supposed to arrive at the same conclusions. In a class of 33 kids, full of their individual perceptions and imaginations, were asked to draw a picture of one thing. We were asked to draw a picture of God.
Naturally this lead to some confusion among the class, as we were never presented an image of the supreme, we were left to our own devices. The results were shared with the entirety of the class, and surely enough, the majority had similar imagery. An old Caucasian man with a flowing white robe and white beard, sitting upon a throne of white puffy clouds on high. Some had rainbows, others had animals, and a few flowers. But they were all essentially the same image. Old white guy on a cloud. The teacher collected them all, to be hung on the board after school, so we would see the display upon our arrival to class the next morning. We all eagerly awaited to see the display of 33 interpretations of God.
The next morning, the class was crowded around the blackboard, comparing notes. One stood out from the display of 33 pictures. It was the simple shape of a 5 pointed star of gold, with numerous rays of light extending in all directions from behind the it.
What made it stand out was the fact that it was not an old man on a cloud. The ridicule came quickly as the observers knew quite assuredly that a 5 pointed star was not what God looked like. Everybody knew what God looked like, and the might of the majority somehow proved this was the case.
As you may have guessed by this point, the 5 pointed star was my drawing. Burdened with the almighty task of making an image of the lord God almighty with a capital “G”, and what I had gathered from religious studies thus far, my task was literally impossible. How do you represent that which, by its very definition, is impossible to define? Even at that young age I was aware of the paradox, though I was not aware of the word “paradox”. My childhood intuition called “bullshit” on the task at hand. Yet I was expected to draw something, so I decided on a symbol surrounded by light and hoped for the best. While I was not aware of it at the time, I was doing exactly what so many people throughout history have tried to do. Use symbols to describe that which could not be described.
For a great deal of time throughout the world, the power of a symbol on paper to represent an idea has existed, and even words were a collection of symbols. It was in the form of writing by that point, conveying ideas to other people. I knew, or rather felt, this was the case. Yet here I was, as a child unable to comprehend that articulately enough to convey, and accepted the shame and ridicule associated with not being a part of the same idea. Not following with the flock, or herd, as the case may be.
Time passed, and I kept searching, although for what I was unsure. I would know it when I saw it.
And see it, I eventually did, though it took no form that I would have expected. But I’ll get to that later.
During that time in school, I was enamored by cartoons, specifically the Japanese variety. These limited 30 minute windows on Saturday mornings made the previous 5 days of school more tolerable. Asking questions only annoyed my teachers, as I learned later, because they were expected to teach criteria, not encourage imagination. Never being one to conform to any designated system, my rebellion began. Not against anything specific, but everything in general. Any preconceived notions of “Truth” in a domesticated group setting.
I began to shop around for a religion or spirituality in my teen years that “spoke” to me, that provided an “inner truth” that I could not particularly argue with. I studied so many belief systems until I was about 23, that I found the whole process somewhat irritating.
It was then that I delved into conspiracy theory. I considered the Ufo’s, the JFK assasination, the moments where reality seemed the most frayed. Whether Atomic experiments were scientific or more occult. Whether UFO’s were real or another Government experiment.
I delved so deeply that I emerged out the other side more spiritual than I was before. I found Terrence McKenna through Richard Andrew Grove, a 9/11 survivor and whistle blower. It was then when I discovered that there was no “real reality”, and that all I thought to have experienced was up to my own conclusions.
That’s when I notice that what I once considered “real” was merely my own minds projection upon the fabric of “reality”, meaning that I was a mere machine, projecting my will upon the fabric that might be called “reality”.
Whether I call it “reality” or not, makes no difference. The result is the same, what I expect it to be.
Now I draw what comes to me. The chaos of the outside world is my muse. There are symbols and ideas that defy conventional definitions. Those are the things and ideas that I enjoy to draw. The chaotic and fantastical elements of a world that is so steeped in mystery and a total lack of any rationality to it. Philosophy and Fantasy do a great deal for me, as they include the extreme notions of the world. So here is where I will stay for now, marking the milestones of my journey through life with a series of illustrations and writings. Each one, another step toward what I search for, whatever it may be.